This conversation has been going on in the background of my head for...oh, I don't know, awhile. Ri and I put it on cyber-paper officially at Ra-Ra's blog last week and we're still working it through. Basically, Ri is 15 years old and ready to date seriously and I - as a mother of a soon-to-be 14-year-old am NOT prepared to think about that.
Now, I KNOW I'm going to have to get over it. I do. Seriously. However, in my head, Ri still needs protecting. I mean, her mother is a character in my brain pan (or a nut as I accidentally said on camera that you can see here). Some people have told me to remember what it was like when I was that age.
@_@
I do. My nose was stuck in a book all the time. Now, granted, there's the time I stole SistaPITA's boyfriend, but I dumped him as soon as he kissed me with CHEW in his mouth. That was gross! Tho, SistaPITA still won't let me forget that I stole him. *snorting laugh* Honestly, she was the one who was boy crazy. I didn't know what to do with them!
Ri: Great. Well, neither do I. Frankie: Don't ask me for any help! It's not coming.
Ri: You are soooo like my mother!
Frankie: Go figure! I drafted her character off of me!
Ri: *growl* That explains a lot.
As you can see, Ri and I are not getting along very well right now. Seriously! It's a constant battle inside my head!
Frankie: Sweetie, please don't do that.
Ri: *sigh* I'm just so frustrated. I don't know what to do and you keep stopping me from doing what I really want to do!
Frankie: I just--*smashes lips together* I don't want to see you go too far. You can easily talk yourself into going to a point that's too far.
Ri: Are you having The Talk with me?
Frankie: No. Your mother did that and it was awkward to watch. No. Um, no. I just--I know that it's easy to...oh, I don't know, uh, feel things out and then the mood just carries you away and before you know it, there's that line that you shouldn't step over and you've not only stepped over it, you've plowed through it. There's touching and feeling and kissing and--
Ri: Ewing? Maybe some mild throwing up? Yeah. I'm seeing that.
Frankie: You say that now, but trust me when I say that you'll get past the "mild throwing up" part and you'll be into the dangerous "holy wow! Did I just become a woman?????" part. It's a slippery slope.
Ri: *pushes hair out of eyes* Would you just trust me? I'm not going to do anything dangerous, or socially unacceptable.
Frankie: You know I don't give two rips about social acceptance. What I care about is you...not making a decision that you can't go back from.
Ri: *clawed hands of rage* I wish you'd just trust me. *storms off*
@_@ You see? I'm REMEMBERing what it was like when I discovered boys. *nods emphatically* And she's discovering them sooner than I did! Someone! Help me!!!!!!
Or help Ri!
Or-or-or--I don't know! Help the BOOK! GAH!
You both need a slap around the head!!
ReplyDeleteFrankie, you should remember how you was at her age, that is true! You've been there and you did what you thought was right at the time. Right of wrong, you did whatever you did despite whatever anyone told you. You survived. It's just part of growing up. You have to trust Ri will do the same, it's out of your hands. You guided her the best way you can, it's up to her now. Trust is hard, but everyone has to learn by their own mistakes, it's just the way it is.
Ri, you know Frankie is right. Frankie wants to trust you, but don't take it personally if she seems over mothering, it's just a mum thing. You will understand one day, trust! It's just what you do when you care about someone. She just doesn't want you to make the same mistakes. Never underestimate experience. You know what is right or wrong, and you're old enough to make your own judgements. It's always easier to learn from other people's mistakes than it is your own, that's what clever people do.
Now, sort it out you two! :)
Kurt, I love you!
ReplyDeleteI think that remembering how I was when I discovered boys is what's driving the fear. I was drastically stupid! On monumental proportions. Now, luckily, Ri is smarter than I was, but then again, I thought I was pretty smart too.
I just have to sit back and let her make her own mistakes. I can do that. I can. I can.
I can....
I can...